2 am..the night before Aidilfitri

Here I am, at 2 am, one day before we celebrate our Aidilfitri - 2005.Couldn't sleep. Lately I have problem sleeping.Don't know why.Maybe I should start swimming, as one of my friend advised me.Hopefully it will make me tired and make it easy to fall asleep.yeah... I think I should try it out.

Aidilfitri...I still remember celebrating Aidilfitri when I was young...I mean much more younger. (I'm still young, ok) Me, my bro and my sist will usually celebrate our Raya at my grandma's place in Terengganu. We were always looking forward to it. Every year. Every Raya.Our mom will drive our car - 7 hours stretch. Sometimes without a break in between. That's my mom.

Celebrating Raya here in Shah Alam compare to Terengganu, is very different. Shah Alam for me is more of a city - not a "kampung". Everybody will return to their "kampung" when it comes to Raya.And you'll see the whole town is empty. Quiet. Even the shops will be closed for a few days. Nothing to celebrate.
We will all get excited as Raya gets near. Each of us had at least 2 pairs of new "baju kurung" or shirt and trousers for my brother. 7 hours stuck in the car - seemed ages for us. Just couldn't wait to reach our grandma's place, to meet our cousins, aunties and uncles. I guess, we had always been the ones they can't wait to meet , coz we were the only family members who stays quite a distance. Don't mention about the "duit raya". Our pockets were never empty.

Now...everything seems different. 20 years later....my bro is in UK with his family. He has been celebrating Raya there for the past few years...I sort of lost count.My sist - she's pregnant now with her 1st baby coming in a few months time. She celebrates Raya, sometimes in Terengganu, sometimes in JB. But this year it will be in Shah Alam as her hubby has to work on the 1st and 2nd day Raya. They are only going back to JB on the 3rd day. Well, as for me, this is my 1st Raya celebrating alone and back to single life. Its tough, its sad. First, I planned to go back to my grandma's place, but unfortunately mom had bought her ticket. So, now plan B is to follow my sist to JB and later go to Singapore to meet my cousin again.

Well, that's only a plan. We can only plan and wish for the best. And we don't know what's the best in store for us until it happens. Sometimes the plans didn't come out as how we wish it to be , but just be positive, its always for the best.

To all my Muslim friends and families out there, I just want to wish "Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri". May all of you have the best ever Raya celebration with your love ones, no matter where you are.